Avengers: Endgame (2019) - Movie Review

Well… here we are. After 11 years, 21 films, over 18 billion dollars in box office receipts and twice as many geekgasms, we have reached the finale of this chapter of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It’s been a long journey, and while part of me is excited for what's in store for this finale, there's still a lingering problem here: How in the actual fuck am I supposed to write a review for this thing?

Avengers: Infinity War (2018) - Movie Review

The plot: After many long years of planning and machination, the alien despot Thanos (Josh Brolin) is ready to initiate his ultimate plan: Gather all of the Infinity Stones and, with their combined power, wipe out half of all life in the universe. As he and his lieutenants make their way to Earth, where most of the Stones now reside, the now-scattered Avengers have to reunite and, with the help of the Guardians Of The Galaxy, stop Thanos from decimating the universe.

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) - Movie Review

Over the last several months, I’ve probably shown every conceivable pre-conception that a person can have for a movie. Whether it’s down to my own weird tastes or just how surprising this year’s releases have turned out, I’ve gone into the cinema with some odd ideas about what it’ll be like. Well, today’s film will likely represent my absolute worst expectations for a film: I want this film to be bad. Now, as much as I’ve talked about the therapeutic power of cinema, I don’t actively like watching bad movies; I rarely if ever want films to be bad, and it’s even rarer that I would want a film to suck to prove a “point”. Basically, after the clusterfuck that went down in the wake of The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which I still maintain is a genuinely good movie despite some definite flaws, learning that the guys behind what is properly the worst film I’ve ever sat through would be behind the next Spider-Man reboot seriously pissed me off. It even got to the point where, and I wish I was joking, I made this claim on Reddit last year:

Just so we’re clear, this is how badly I not only didn’t want to see those numbnuts get rewarded for their lack of effort, but how badly I wanted some hubris to kick in after the honestly OTT reactions ASM2 got. But as I’ve already established, I’m a bit of a fanboy for comic book movies and I’m usually a lot kinder to them than I probably should be; I may not be happy to be proven wrong in this instance but I definitely get that the possibility of it happening here is pretty high. Anyway, enough waffle, let’s see where my cold-hearted cynicism gets me as we look at the latest iteration of the New York Webslinger.

Captain America: Civil War (2016) - Movie Review

Back in 2007, long before my critical awakening even took place that would forever change (for better or for worse) how I look at media in general, I became embroiled in the original Civil War comic book event. This is without having read a single issue of the comic itself, nor any of the many, many tie-in issues. I have the Marvel Universe wiki to thank for this, as I wound up spending a lot of time at one of my school’s library computers reading up on various characters who were involved in the event. It is with this tertiary knowledge that I can safely say that this addition to the MCU might be one of the single riskiest ventures they have ever undertaken, as the fallout as a result of the original story is staggering and still being felt to this day. It doesn’t help that the inclusion of a certain character in this story almost guarantees that I need to go into comparisons with the source material; regular readers will know that I always try and avoid that when possible. So, as I wade through the massive backlog of releases I’ve accumulated over the last few weeks, I figure I’d start out with the most potentially problematic of them all.

Avengers: Age Of Ultron (2015) - Movie Review

With the current cinematic dictatorship Hollywood is under thanks to Marvel Studios, it’s easy to see the point of view of people who are getting sick of comic book movies considering not only the frequency of their output but also the insane amounts of preparation they put into their releases, ensuring said frequency for the next several years. However, given the rather lacklustre comic book fare that came before Iron Man curb-stomped its way into the public consciousness (Look at any list online for worst films ever made, and I guaran-damn-tee you that several of the entries will be older superhero films) as well as my own preference for the genre, I’m not sharing in that thought process. So, when the release date came out for the follow-up to Joss Whedon’s 2012 geekgasm The Avengers, I joined in and added to the already copious amount of fanboy drool in the ocean. But, considering how legendary the original has become in such a short amount of time, how does this hold up?