The War With Grandpa (2020) - Movie Review

This is the perfect storm of bad movie. Family film starring late-period Robert De Niro? Check. Uma Thurman overacting to the point you forget she’s actually talented? Check. Made by a filmmaker who proved this same year to be above this shit? Check. Written by the duo who gave us one of the worst scripts of all time? Check. Filmed years ago but only got pulled off the shelf during a dead cinematic season? Check. Reason for said shelving involving Weinstein? Check, check, and check. This film’s mere existence is baffling enough, but the actual content is on a whole other level.

The House That Jack Built (2019) - Movie Review

I feel like a john when discussing movies like this. Movies where the main intent at its core is to shock people by any means necessary, in this case made by a man who has basically built an entire career out of playing edgelord for the arthouse crowd. While that methodology has at least brought Lars Von Trier to some actual dramatic engagement on occasion, and even his worst films show a level of effort that is the least I ask for from edgelords (nothing worse than someone trying to shock you while putting in zero effort whatsoever), the man’s status as provocateur makes watching his movies, particularly his most recent ones, feel like I’m just playing into his hand. And unfortunately, the same applies for this one.

Burnt (2015) - Movie Review

Of the many, many things that I don’t possess nearly as much expertise in, or feign to have expertise in at least, as film, food would have to be one of the bigger ones. I have little to no interest in cooking shows that don’t includes the words “Iron Chef”, my taste buds have dulled from so much fast food that I wouldn’t be able to taste each of the secret herbs & spices even if I was actively told what they were, and I cannot for the life of me take the more cut-throat kitchen dramas out there seriously. Maybe if I spent long enough in the more hoity-toity restaurants of the world, then maybe seeing chefs completely lose their shit would make a bit more sense to me. Or maybe if I had watched a lot less of Gordon Ramsey’s signature freak-outs when I was growing up; that might've helped too. So, with all this in mind, I’m probably not the ideal audience for this kind of film. But it’s not as if this is the first, nor will it be the last time that this will happen, so it’ll be regular snarky business as usual.