The School For Good And Evil (2022) - Movie Review

Y’know, I’m starting to think that Paul Feig is just a hack. After his take on Ghostbusters failed to please (and honestly, whatever defences I had for it just grow fainter in my memory in the years since I watched it), he seems to be trying to do anything except for the raunchy comedy that he showed skill at with Bridesmaids, The Heat, and even Spy. A Simple Favor had him put on his best French affectation, and yeah, it was pretty good, but that was mainly from the borrowed aesthetics rather than anything identifiably him. Then there was his attempt at a British rom-com with Last Christmas, which is still one of the most laughable misfires I’ve ever covered on here for how it mangled the songs of George Michael. And now, he’s trying to make a high fantasy school setting, some proper 1^st wave YA material, and… yikes.

After We Collided (2020) - Movie Review

Well, this is awkward. Between After being one of the worst films I saw last year, and seeing just how bad Fifty Shades rip-offs can get with 365 Days, I was fully expecting to hate this movie. But honestly… I had a lot of fun with this.

The New Mutants (2020) - Movie Review

In a year that has seen one of the biggest shake-ups in the Hollywood release schedule of all time, the fact that this movie, one most of us weren’t even sure we’d ever get, managed to come out is kind of miraculous. Of course, in that miracle lies the biggest obstacle standing between this production and success: The fact that we’ve been teased about this thing for a few years by now. Personally, I was counting my blessings that this film made it to theatrical release to begin with, and knowing how wonky the X-Men franchise has been these last several years, I didn’t really go into this with major expectations or anything. I get the feeling that that’s the best way to approach this film, as it’s honestly pretty damn good when taken on its own terms.

Harmony: The Five Frequencies Part 1 (2018) - Movie Review

The plot: Harmony (Jessica Falkholt) was born with the ability to take away people's fear and darkness. As she struggles to survive homeless on the streets of an unforgiving city, a chance encounter with psychiatrist Beth (Jacqueline McKenzie) leads her to meeting Mason (Jerome Meyer), the first person Harmony didn't detect any fear within. It seems that these two have more connecting them than they realise, and as a dark storm approaches, they might be our only chance for salvation.

The Darkest Minds (2018) - Movie Review

The plot: A mysterious disease has spread across the United States, killing most of the children and giving the survivors superhuman abilities. Out of fear of what the disease, or its carriers, could do next, children are rounded up into camps and, if any of them are too powerful, they are exterminated. One of the kids, Ruby (Amandla Stenberg), finds a way out of one of the camps and comes across runaways Liam (Harris Dickinson), Chubs (Skylan Brooks) and Zu (Miya Cech). With the government hunting after them, and no certainty of which (if any) adults they can trust, they'll have to rely on each other in order to survive.

Everything, Everything (2017) - Movie Review

I’ve covered a lot of movies during this blog’s relatively short existence. In that time, I think I’ve run the gamut in terms of initial reactions. From the sensible (New Michael Bay Transformers movie is probably going to suck) to the somewhat irrational (The Angry Birds Movie has a vendetta against me personally), I’ve shown a pretty broad spectrum. Well, for the second time this year, we’re dealing with a film that I am having difficulty believing even exists in the first place.

Before I Fall (2017) - Movie Review

It seems that films about time travel, and in particular films involving time loops, are continuing to grow popular. While my affinity for sci-fi should make me glad that such a staple of the genre is gaining ground, I am held back by the simple fact that there are just far too many of them. Looper, About Time, Edge Of Tomorrow, Predestination, ARQ, Doctor Strange to a lesser extent, even previous adolescent-centric films like Project Almanac; all in the space of five years. Yeah, I actually quite like most of these titles but the basic formula that is at large between them is now starting to get stale. Variety keeps the world interesting and unless we find a good third-party premise that can exist beyond both this and the standard superhero suspension of disbelief, it seems that we aren’t likely to get any. Will today’s film at least keep things interesting or will the seams start showing?

Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children (2016) - Movie Review

Sometimes, a film comes out where the filmmaker(s) and subject matter match each other that well that you start to question why it’s only now that such a connection was made. On one hand, you have director Tim Burton, a man whom has made a career out of telling stories of pale-skinned outsiders and giving them their rightful place in the world. On the other, we have the modern YA adaptation sub-genre, which has latched onto the public consciousness through teenaged empowerment fantasies of going against the system that wronged them. Add to this screenwriter Jane Goldman, whose work with Matthew Vaughn embodies that same air of acknowledging and celebrating the abnormal, and you have probably the most ideal combination of any film this year… in theory, at least. After all, as much I like Burton, Goldman and some of the higher-profile YA adaptations (I maintain that The Hunger Games is still an amazing film series), none of the above are immune from being rubbish. Last year’s me may argue this point, but I hadn’t yet seen Mars Attacks at that point; this year’s me knows that this guy is capable of making crap. So, even with all the right pieces in place behind the scenes, how does the final product look?

Nerve (2016) - Movie Review

Using game shows, and more recently augmented reality games, as a means of societal commentary is old hat by this point. Whether it’s the dark satire of Death Race 2000, the hyper-machismo of The Running Man or even the surreal tinge of comedy in Bad Wolf, an episode of Doctor Who, this isn’t anything new. Not that being tried-and-true is something to be instantly ashamed of; just that it means extra effort needs to be made in order for the work to stand out. Well, with the ever-increasing proclivity of the Internet and its many, many outlets, specifically social media, YouTube and even the fascination surrounding Pokémon Go!, maybe it’s time for such a commentary to be made anew. We can only hope that this film is capable of delivering on that. Spoiler alert: No, it isn’t; not by a long shot.

The Divergent Series: Allegiant (2016) - Movie Review

Looks like we have another addition to the series that never ceases to make no sense… except the battlefield has shifted this time around. While the previous films hadn’t gotten that hot a reception with critics, I would’ve considered those as an honorary critical disagreement as it seemed like I was the only one who could see these films as the absolute nonsense that they were. Everyone was going on about how derivative they were (and they most certainly are) and how they’re mediocre at best. And then along came this film and suddenly everyone felt the same growing feeling of confusion as me. Must be a way to balance out what happened with me and Melissa McCarthy. So, now when I endlessly bitch about continuity errors and exhibit the kind of ephemera retention that makes Trekkies blush, I won’t be the only guy doing it this time. It’s the hate that brings people together. So, without further ado, let’s get into this whopping 12%-er and see if my expectations were met from last time, in that this somehow makes everything even more confusing.

The 5th Wave (2016) - Movie Review

If there’s one name that I have come to associate with sub-standard product, aside from our resident whipping boy Jai Courtney, it’s one all-time Hollywood hack by the name of Akiva Goldsman. Sure, he has a couple of winning films to his name like A Beautiful Mind and, depending on who you ask, I Am Legend, but as a whole, this man is responsible for a lot of shite as a screenwriter. Last year’s Insurgent, Winter’s Tale the year before, The Da Vinci Code and Angels & Demons, and let’s not forget the crowning jewel of bad comic book movies Batman & Robin; that’s a hefty platter for a single chef. With all this in mind, I look at today’s most recent YA adaptation with extreme scepticism; only this time, there’s more than definite reason for me to be so. But, given how lenient I’ve been with The Maze Runner and how much praise I’ve given to The Hunger Games, and knowing how it doesn’t get much worse than Divergent, I’m still willing to give this a chance. I’m holding out an idiot’s hope, aren’t I?

Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (2015) - Movie Review

With the Hunger Games drawing to a close at the end of this year and the Divergent series only getting worse with each instalment, the third-wave of YA adaptations may soon be reaching its conclusion… or, at least, we can only hope lest we have to sit through the same darkly shot post-apocalyptic analogies for high school for another three bloody years. However, it seems that we may be able to squeeze at least one more good series out of the fad: The Maze Runner.

2014’s The Maze Runner, in my not-so-humble opinion, is easily one of the most underrated films of the year, if not of the entire wave. It’s probably one of the few times that the attempts at analogy with these films has panned out, as the plot works as a surprisingly nuanced, if flawed, fable on the transition from adolescence to adulthood: Venturing out into the unknown, leaving your old ways behind you, discovering the opposite gender in a new light; coming from a bunch of first-time writers under a first-time director, this is kind of astounding. As such, other than the complete surprise of John Wick, this was the film that I have been most looking forward to a sequel to; with how cynical I can be when it comes to my own expectations, it’s rare that I genuinely anticipate a good film these days. So, how does this sequel turn out?

Insurgent (2015) - Movie Review

With the severe case of sequelitis Hollywood has been suffering from, getting to sequels/remakes of films I’ve already reviewed is inevitable. Of course, there’s two sides to that coin and I’ll end up seeing follow-ups to both the good and the bad. This time around, we are very much in the latter with the sequel to what I listed as the worst movie of 2014: Divergent. Now, this is a listing that I question from time to time, considering it beat out utter trash like the Annie remake and God’s Not Dead for that coveted placement, but out of sheer incompetence in creating a world for the story to exist in, I feel it more than deserves that spot. I usually go back to older films for a refresher in cases like this… but screw that noise, let’s just get into this thing already.

Seventh Son (2015) - Movie Review

With Hollywood currently ingrained in third-wave YA adaptation territory with the upcoming finale to the Hunger Games series later on this year and the recently released thing-I-look-forward-to-like-an-axe-to-the-genitals Insurgent, it’s kind of refreshing to a good old fashioned first-wave fantasy film. Sure, it’s another retread of the Hero’s Journey that most scriptwriters can literally write in their sleep, but any variety is better than no variety. Of course, last time “Young Adult Adaptation” and “Jeff Bridges” shared space with each other, we got the severe let-down The Giver, so I can’t exactly say that I’m looking forward to this all that much. However, the combo of Bridges and Julianne Moore will attract me to pretty much anything at this rate, so let’s get into this.

The Book Thief (2014) - Movie Review

Of all the films to have come out of the big YA adaptation boom of late, I can safely say that I would never have expected this one. However, I can at least semi-understand the decision behind this on two fronts. Firstly, the third-wave of YA adaptations has been largely focused on dark, totalitarian and/or post-apocalyptic settings, so it only stands to reason that a setting from our own history that unfortunately fits into that category would be considered. Secondly, films set in Nazi Germany are easy Oscar bait. So, given this criteria, today’s film was one designed not only to appease the Academy crowd but also as a sleeper agent to get the attention of teens who likely would have read or are currently reading the source material for school… what could possibly go wrong? This is The Book Thief.